5 Reminders For When Past Trauma Threatens to Overtake You
Once you’ve experienced trauma it’s easy to feel like in an instant you’re being transported back to that place. For me, Each time his eyes fixed, Each time his color changed, Each time he showed the slightest tremble, it felt like my heart would stop. It would bring me back to the panic of calling 9-1-1, the agony of our ambulance transport, the anguish of fearing I might lose my baby. Yes, once you’ve experienced trauma it’s easy to feel like in an instant you’re being transported back to that place. For me, When his eyes fixed, I couldn’t help but hold my breath. I would breathe it out only when I realized his eyes fix just before getting heavy, just seconds before he peacefully drifts off to sleep. For me, When his color changed, I couldn’t help but hold my breath. I would breathe it out only when I realized his face reddens only because he grunts to produce a big, dirty diaper. For me, When he showed the slightest tremble, I couldn’t help but hold my breath. I would breathe it out only when I realized the sudden movement is just one of the innate and completely normal baby reflexes. Yes, once you’ve experienced trauma it’s easy to feel like in an instant you’re being transported back to that place.
When the fear of revisiting the trauma threatens to consume me, I remind myself of God’s character and his faithfulness.
1. God is the one who saved my boy. He is the one who protected him. God carried us through those moments victoriously, and He can be trusted to do it again.
2. “He who created a good work in us is faithful to complete it.” God created my son with a purpose and for a purpose. He will continue to work in his life.
3. God cares for me. He wants me to cast all my fears and worries on Him. He can handle them and He is the only one who can really do something about them.
4. Our Almighty God is in control. The Creator of Heaven and Earth, the one who knit my son together and brought him into this world, is in control. He rules Heaven from His throne. I can trust that no situation is too big for God, not even what I may be feeling in the moment.
5. Our God is greater—greater than any fear or any scare tactic the enemy might try to haunt me with. When I remember to take captive every thought, I can tell the enemy to flee and regain control of my mind by speaking God’s truth over my son.
And this faith, this reminder of who He is and what He is all about, helps me to combat the feelings of reverting back and reliving the trauma we’ve experienced.
Hope in the unexpected©
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